Do you know your love language? Here’s how it can help deepen your connection with your partner
Think about this: while being in a romantic relationship, some days can be exceptionally special with your significant other, while others can seem mundane. Goes without saying that there’s a mutual love for as long as the relationship lives (and beyond too), but then what is it that makes those special days, well … special? Gary Chapman, a world-famous author published his book 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts in 1992, where he extensively wrote about the concept of ‘Love Language’ and its five types. Whether you’re looking to improve the communication between you and your partner or simply spice things up in the bedroom, understanding and implementing this concept will do the deal for you.
What are love languages?
One’s love language basically refers to their most preferred and desired way of receiving as well as expressing love. For some it can be showering their partner with presents, for others, it can be craving endless days and nights together. Yes, a person could have more than one love language, but there will always be one that’s more dominant. And, to acknowledge and empathise with your partner’s love language is key to ensure a freeway of communication, unhindered by any roadblocks.
Discover your love language
Words of Affirmation
American-based author and TedX speaker Michelle Lederman quotes, “Opening up a conversation can be opening up a world of new possibilities.” This is especially true in the case of people who consider communication—words of affirmation, precisely, as their love language. Who doesn’t like the sound of ardent expressions like “I love you”, “I care for you”, or “You mean the world to me”—we all do! But for some, it can be quite a game-changer. If verbal reaffirmations are your partner’s love language, communication becomes of paramount importance. The point is to stay connected and keep in touch, through phone calls, messages or just a share on social media. Maintaining this kind of communication can give your partner a sense of security, assurance and composure at all times.
We all crave quality time with our love, but if this is your partner’s love language, you must know that you just can’t give this a miss. In-person interactions, experiencing new things together and conversations with eye contact can fill your partner’s heart with joy and delight. Your significant other could expect a higher frequency of quality time and that’s okay, provided your hangouts are packed with meaningful conversations and a deeper discovery of one another. Who knows, this might just steam things up in the bedroom as well.
Do you like it when you’re presented with a flower, that much-coveted book or anything that’s been lying on your wishlist since a while? Chances are that receiving gifts is your love language. There’s a little of this love language in each one of us, but for some, it is a ride-or-die—the unparalleled expression of love through little surprises wrapped with a ribbon. And before you confuse this language with being materialistic, it’s not the object, but the thought that reflects immense care, love and most importantly—attention to detail (about your likes and preferences that you would have spoken about in the past).
Acts of Service
If you like your partner going that extra mile for you, trust acts of service to be your dominant love language. Whether it’s checking up on you every 30 minutes when you’re sick, a surprise pick up from work or just clearing up the kitchen when you’re having a hectic day, these little acts of kindness can translate into abundant happiness and gratification for you. After all, it’s the little things that matter, right?
Physical touch is all about physical intimacy and more. From a comforting hug and a little peck on the forehead to cuddling and pleasure-driven sex, every act of physical intimacy can serve as a huge turn-on for your partner, if their love language is physical touch. It certainly allows a couple to connect at a deeper level and unearth secrets about each other. To be held with love is one of the most blissful and precious gestures for anyone who is in love, and when physical touch is your dominant love language, it only brings more warmth, comfort and passion into your relationship.